Running on Empty

This morning, I woke thinking that is the weirdest dream I've ever had. I reached across the bed, felt a cold pillow and realised it's not a dream at all. Either that or I'm still not awake.

I called every person in our address book. No-one picked up. I tried 999 but only got a recorded message, something about technical difficulties. Then I tried random combinations of numbers. Most didn't connect and the ones that did rang endlessly. I was stupid to think anyone would answer. I was just hoping that whatever has happened is limited to Hanworth. No such luck.

The TV is just a blue screen with the legend "No signal is being received". The radio is not picking up any stations at all. The internet is working but the last story on any of the news sites was posted two days ago.

I know I should be panicking but I think everyone must have been taken somewhere - so in my mind that means they are all okay. There's no bodies, no blood, thank God. They just all seem to have vanished in the middle of the night.

It took me a little over an hour to knock on every door down my street. I even peeked through windows. In the few houses that did have open curtains, there was no signs of struggle inside. Nothing looked particularly out of place unless you count the fact all the pets are also missing.

I stood out in the middle of the street and screamed at the top of my lungs. The sound reverberated off the buildings, jumping from house to house. No reaction. No-one came running. No-one shouted out for me to shut up. It's just me.

Most people like to spend some time on their own. It is nice sometimes to not have to think of anyone else. I don't know anyone who would choose to totally disconnect from society and live alone, never having contact with anyone. If they did, people would think them strange. It is in our nature to socialise. We need to interact with other people, even if they are strangers.

I have to find someone - anyone.

I drove for hours. I didn't even know where I was going really. I just needed to check as big an area as possible. I don't think the M25 has been this empty since it was first built. Do motorways get built or laid? Whatever - the world's biggest car park was completely barren. I passed a sign warning "Queues ahead" but I never saw another car. I drove as far as the Watford turn-off before circling the roundabout and heading back. Without really thinking, I detoured onto the M4 and then came off at Hayes. Before I realised it, I was parked outside my mum's house. I couldn't find the courage to walk up the path. The curtains were closed.

My mother is meticulous in her routine. She gets up at six-thirty every morning without an alarm clock. She opens all the curtains before she even puts the kettle on for her morning tea. I didn't have to knock on the door to know she wasn't there.

The tears finally came. Then the rain came and it felt like the world was crying with me. I don't know how long I sat there but it was long enough for the inside of the windows to mist up and for day to turn to dusk.

I drove the long way home keeping off the main roads. I wasn't in any great rush to return to my empty house and spend another evening alone but there was nothing else to do. I was cold and tired and crying makes me hungry.